Category: funny

Things that I find entertaining

If you hate gay marriage, have I got bad news for you….

So, not only are Cy and I getting married, BUT you’re losing the USA in a big, BIG way.

For those of you who really think that Natalie Grant was being “brave” for walking out on the Grammy’s (heh, I initially mis-typed that is “Granny’s”), may I suggest a few other places you might feel more welcome?

First of all, go enjoy the Olympic games at Sochi. According to their Mayor, no fags there! So: descend, my straight AND narrow hordes! Descend upon Sochi! (Go ahead — show them that there are closeted Bi folks!)

Then — oooo! — Saudi Arabia! No fags (but plenty of post-op-transexuals — women, in the eyes of the Wahabist!) You know what else you’ll love about the Saudis? No women drivers! (OK, OK, no PRE-OP women drivers!)

But honestly, if you’re a true — and I do mean TRUE — libertarian? There’s no place better than Somalia! Taxes? NONE! Goernment regulation? NONE! Personal freedom? Whatever you can defend with your own night! Now THAT’S the true Ayn Randian experience! (Holy crap, I sound like a travelogue!)

Finally, Uganda: you and your friends worked SO hard to be allowed to kill me there (should I ever be SO stupid as to go!) howsabout you go there for me instead?

It’s been a good, busy first week.

The funniest part? As soon as I got my work phone, I had to get a photo of my rental car to use as a background:

Below economy, apparently there is a “hilarious” class…

Apparently, below “economy”, there is a “hilarious” class…

Happy new everything…

You know, as much attention as the recreational pot in Colorado story is getting, you would think it was mandatory, and that by this time tomorrow, the only other surviving industry in the state will be pizza delivery.

It’s been much too long since I’ve cleaned out my bookmarks folder: here is the result:

A PDF printing neologism

Wand re-orchestration is complete. The conductor score PDF is designed to be printed on legal-sized paper, but  auto-resizes as needed.  It was going to legal paper, but the tray was marked as letter. Or, as I now call it, barely legal.

Just heard the most delightful line:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can bill for it.

Obviously, the context is IT consulting, not politics. But now that I think about it… How much did Cruz make, and how much did it cost America?

So, the key question is this:

Is “Dexter” being put out of my misery? Or am I being put out of “Dexter’s” misery?

There is a reason why for the past (n) weeks I’ve watched Dexter before “Breaking Bad”.

That reason? So that I would NOT waste energy screaming at the TV about how awful Dexter had become.

The ONLY saving grace in my life is eleven years old. Scott Buck, as a viewer of the show for 7 seasons, I deserve to watch some pain, some contrition. Instead, all I’ve seen has been safe, stable continuation of unbelievable premises. For shame!

At least Water White is going to stand up for what he is, and what he’s done. He’s a horrible human, but he is going to fight for his right to be human….

Not some lame caricature that resurrects himself with no connection to his past. Shame on you, Scott Buck. Had you cut that last lumberjack-off minute, you would have had a decent show. Shame on you.

And, yes. I expect the phrase “lumber-jackoff” to stick, and to apply to you for the rest of your career. You’re welcome.

Flattered twice in the past 24 hours…

G said two things:

  1. Everyone in the house, including the dog, loves my bread.
  2. I should stay home all day to bake bread. Apparently that’s worth more to her than my day job…

My fear is that when she learns that I don’t bake during the heat of summer, she’ll try to get me to move further north. That’s NOT going to happen…